How to Survive This Weather: The Essential List
So most students at ICO are taking finals right now. (As a fourth year, I’m done with all that.)
I’d commiserate and cry tears of empathy, but I’m not sure I can spare the energy.
As most of you know, Chicago and much of the country is under what may be called a deep freeze.
The great lakes are frozen over. Your legs haven’t seen sunlight in months, you aren’t entirely sure what T-shirts are anymore, and you can pop your head into the freezer for a nice relief of warmth.
If a Calgarian is complaining about the cold, you know you’re in trouble.
Here are some tips to help you stay warm in this bitter, bitter cold.
1. Heat your apartment This may seem like a no-brainer to smart optometry kids. The reality is that not all furnaces are built alike and you may have one that pretends to work but doesn’t. This is the kind of furnace I have. Like a petulant teenager, I have to gently persuade it to be useful. It rarely listens.
2. Wear thermal underwear I know what you’re thinking. “Siva”, you may cry out, “you are the height of style. How can you suggest something so crass and unstylish and downright embarrassing as thermal underwear? It’s just not cool!” You’re right, pumpkin. It’s not cool. It’s warm.
3. Steal warm clothing from unwilling friends First of all, I think a little kleptomania is normal. It’s a sign of how much I like you that I’ve pilfered your stuff. In particular, a warm oversized hoodie does the trick. So cozy. And since you’ve now done something (borderline) illegal, your heart has blackened over. Again kids, don’t worry. Black absorbs heat and now you’re a solid two degrees warmer.
4. Make chai Ah, the Indian staple of excellence. All you need is some Red Rose tea bags, some milk, some cloves, cardamom, a dash of cinnamon and some sugar. The tricky part is washing the mug, which inevitably will slip, break, and slice open your finger. You win some, you lose some. A scary picture of your bloody thumb is worth it.
5. Bite the bullet and go somewhere warm Your friends will feel bad that your thumbs have been so cold and maimed that you can’t text them anymore. You’ll get offered a couch with some warm blankets and probably prime seating to watch the Olympics. In return, you’ll have to promise to stop stealing their sweaters.
It’s worth it, I suppose.
Stay warm, my friends.
Spring is only a few (more) months away.
top photo courtesy Jonathan Dong